{"Plot"}Monkeys and Bloons fighting as usual, also it escalated a ton and a shitload of quests.

And all the while a dark secret haunts the world...

{Sign Up Sheet}Name:

Species: (Doesn't have to be a Monkey, but it should be humanoid. You all get the same stats either way, so pick whatever species. Except possibly aliens? I might include aliens into the world. Who knows.)

Tower: (Choose any non-Super Monkey 0/0 tower for starting weapons and possibly stats. You can gain more tower powers through certain quests, almost all of which are easy but come on, you have better things to do.)

{Stats}Stamina: The thing that makes you not tired and also represents your health. To put no points in this lets you take like one hit before dying.

Strength: Thing that makes you hit stuff and not have that action be completely worthless. To put no points into this makes you Pickle Inspector and also that is a stupid decision.

Agility: The go fast and do fast stat. To put no points into this is even more stupid, because you can only go at a zombie shuffling pace. All the time.

Magic: Your magic output. Putting no points into this might sound good at first, but remember that 10 is average and everyone can learn it unless you decide to make it 0.

Intellectual: Lets you... solve puzzles and be smart, I guess. No points means you're braindead.

{Quests}You gotta learn this shit, little guy: Your brother, as OUTRAGEOUSLY COOL as he may be, wants you to lift these 28 crates onto his truck. Because one day, you gotta be as OUTRAGEOUSLY COOL as he is, because OUTRAGEOUSLY COOL PEOPLE always die OUTRAGEOUSLY COOL AND YOUNG and he's like in his thirties. Unless your name is Joseph, but you don't get a free pass you little shit. Automatically gain +1 in Strength and +1 in Stamina, plus 30 gold (and you're pretty sure that's not how he gets all the money he seems to spend on you).

VROOOOOM: Get a driver's license. You'll get... a driver's license for it.

Dartkind: Learn to throw darts at the nearby dart monkey training academy, or improve your dart skills to shoot further. Gain 50 gold, and a free upgrade if you are a Dart Thrower, learn Dart Throwing if not.

Okay, so that's a thing: Learn to use Spike-o-pults, allowing you to go beyond 2/x.

MONKEY NANDAYO: Teach other monkeys how to tower stuff. As in, tiny children monkeys that are an absolute pain to handle because you're pretty sure you only qualify as an intern at best. Gain 100 gold for putting up with their shit, and +1 in Intellectual. Requires any Tower Quest to be completed.

At-TAAAAAACK!: Pilot a tack shooter and learn how to mash the singular button in the cockpit. "Learn" how to shoot tacks, or gain an upgrade if already chosen. Plus 40 Gold. -1 Intellectual

Some guy's crosshairs: Learn to shoot sniper rifles with range limited to your vision. +1 Intellectual, learn sniping or gain upgrade if chosen as starting tower.

I thought you promised there wouldn't be any: Learn to throw boomerangs. Agility apparently not required. +1 Agility and learn Boomerang Throwing or gain an upgrade if selected as tower of choice. Also 50 Gold.

Those look pretty sharp...: Learn to throw Glaives once you hit 1/x. It lets you throw Glaives.

I AM VERY STEALTHY: LEARN TO THROW SHURIKENS IN BRIGHT ORANGE GARB. +1 Agility and learn to use Throwing Stars, or an upgrade if selected as tower of choice. Also 50 Gold.

No but seriously though I'm good: After you reach 3/3 Ninja, head for the Archive of Ancient Knowledge, where you will be able to break free from the 3/3 mold after a bit of guidance from the Guardians. Requires "I AM VERY STEALTHY"

LIGHT ZA DUSTO: Learn to bomb the shit out of stuff by lighting a cannon. Dust optional. +70 gold and learning to shoot bombs, or an upgrade if selected as starting tower.

A Song of Feelings and Ice: Learn to let go of your inexplicably Disney-hating tether and learn ice tower powers. You gain can access a whole slew of ice spells and Ice Tower powers, or get TWO free upgrades if you start as an Ice Tower. And +3 Magic.

The Last Gluebender: Learn to shoot glue and oh god it's everywhere. Gain +50 Gold and Glue Shooting skills, or two free upgrades if starting as this, but why would you.

Better stock up for this one, son: Before you go to the elusive but not really Pirate Cove to gain buccaneering skills, you're going to have to learn to build a basic boat, and later learn how to repair a bigger boat. Gain Basic Boat Blueprint, and access to the Pirate Cove. Even though that's also how you train the first path.

BANG TAP DING: ORIGINS: Go learn how to computer science in a school. Requires 300 Gold, gain access to more computer heavy upgrades for other towers. Also, +2 Intellectual.

Waterbitch: Training to be a Buccaneer Captain of any kind requires you be a great leader. After all, you need to lead a crew, and if you're fast enough to do everything by yourself... well for one, you aren't and can never be; not even your OUTRAGEOUSLY COOL Bro can man a buccaneer himself. You're going to need to learn to command a crew to take down the Sea Spirits infesting the nearby water. Gain Buccaneer abilities, or a free upgrade if you select Buccaneer as a starting tower. Requires "MONKEY NANDAYO" and "Better stock up for this one, son".

Maximum Equalizer: You have the Needdragon for Speedwagon, and by that I mean learn to fly a plane. It MAY look like a tack shooter with movement and other weapons, but let me tell you, it's not that easy to fly a plane. +2 Agility and Monkey Ace skills, or two free upgrades if selected as starting tower. Flying outside of the country, whatever it may be, will require a different license.

Yer' a wizard, lad: Learn to magic. +40 Gold, +2 Magic, gain access to magic in general. Not required for "A Song of Feelings and Ice".

DO THE WINDY THING DO THE WINDY THING: Go to the Wind Spire to learn Wind Magic, allowing you to go beyond 2/x. Requires "Yer' a wizard, lad"

Through The Fire and the Flames: Go to the Fire Pit and learn Fire Magic, allowing you to go beyond x/2. Requires "Yer' a wizard, lad"

Sheer Heart Attack? I got nothing for this name: Now that you learned to blow shit up, it's time to learn to blow shit up from further away. Requires "LIGHT ZA DUSTO", Gain Mortar abilities, a free upgrade if selected as starting tower. Also 40 gold.

EEEYAAAH!: Squeezing the trigger of the gun isn't hard, and hurting others isn't exactly an issue give the weird lack of friendly fire. It's the recoil you need to brace yourself for. +1 Strength, Dartling Gun skills or reduction in recoil if chosen as starting tower. Also, 12 Gold.

Where's that DAMN energy crystal?: Look for an energy crystal: the closer to purple the better, but honestly they're all rare as fuck so you can get away with red. This lets you go beyond 3/x.

That... actually explains a lot: Work in a Spike Factory for a day. +20 Gold, +1 Stamina

Middle Rung: Manage a Spike Factory. Gain Spike Factory skills, or an upgrade if chosen as starting tower. Requires "MONKEY NANDAYO" and "That... actually explains a lot".

BANG TAP DING: Learn all sorts of math (offscreen) and shoot nail guns. Gain +30 Gold, +1 Intellectual, Engineer attacks and immediately be able to build sentries.

F1X TH1S: You've had enough of the incredibly shitty tack shooter. Invent some proper... wheels? Caterpillar tracks? SOMETHING THAT MAKES IT LESS SHITTY FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT'S GOOD AND HOLY. +1 Intellectual, +1 Stamina, +300 Gold. Requires "At-TAAAAAACK!" and "BANG TAP DING".

VACUUM CLEANER SPONSORSHIP GOES HERE: Go... learn Bloonchipper stuff? I'll think of rewards later, I'm burnt out for towers.

Support Chopper Inbound: Learn to fly a helicopter. +1 Intellectual, +1 Agility, learn Helicopter skills or get a free upgrade if chosen as starting tower. Requires "Maximum Equalizer".

Waterbitch 2: Waterbitch Harder: Learn to operate a submarine. +50 Gold, gain Submarine skills or a free upgrade if chosen as starting tower. Requires "Waterbitch".

Dude. Arena. Now. Bring Skills: Your OUTRAGEOUSLY COOL bro is back and wants to see just how OUTRAGEOUSLY COOL you are now. He will challenge you with 10% of his effort, but you better make sure your stats are at least above average, if nothing else. You gain a Katana as a reward for defeating him.

Infiltrating The Base: Take out a base of Bloons. Be warned that they have up to black and white Bloons in there, even if the extent of all of their attacks is "ramming into you hoping you pop them and get radiation burns". Gain 200 Gold, +1 all stats.

Supply Line Showdown: Face off a bigger and better base of Bloons, with Ceramics aplenty and a few MOABs here and there. The MOABs have cannons, by the way. Requires "Infiltrating The Base". Gain 300 Gold, +2 all stats.

You know, I never knew what the Z meant in the original...: Take down a ZOMG. Be warned, there are machine guns on there, and you'll have to deal with the BFBs on the inside inevitably... and the MOABs... and the hard hitting Cera- you get the idea. Gain 500 Gold, +3 all stats.

Kneel before TZOD: This has been their biggest, baddest Bloon yet: The TZOD. This thing is practically a flying fortress, with its own staff of a few MOAB class Bloons, and the true payload within is a set of 4 HINDENBURGs, which not only have MOAB class Bloons that are either ZOMGs or stronger, but they're also rigged with a shitload of explosives. They're basically mini nukes but with other options: take the TZOD down before the world flips the fuck out from the destruction it will cause. You'll have a lot of temporary allies for this.

Magic Tricks: Entertain some kids with your skills. Gain 30 Gold. Requires a 14 in any stat, or "Yer' a wizard, lad"

Just kidding, have some sweets: Give sweets to a bunch of kids. Shouldn't be too hard, a box of caramels is like 1 gold. You'll probably be more popular with the town you start in, which is to say wherever the fuck you think it is. I assume either America or Australia.

Jack-o-Lantern: Find the ever elusive pumpkin and carve a jack-o-lantern. Entering competitions with it is optional. Arbitrarily gain +2 Magic upon completion

Costume Party: Get and wear a costume for a party by the local rich guy. Not really a quest, just something for you to do.

Hey Ya!: Strike up a conversation with a total of five people. You may or may not gain allies this way.

I'll be there for you: Help an ally evolve to their final stage. The difficulty really depends on what kind of ally, and you gain like 10 stat points for your troubles.

The Good Ol' Days: Build a giant Operation Dart Storm. Requires you to be x/3 Ace, 2/2 Engineer and to have completed "Hey Ya!"

Tuck Them In Goodnight: Zombies and Ghosts have risen from the cemetery. Shove them back where they came from. +1 every stat but intellectual, 100 Gold.

Heir to the Outrageously Cool Throne: Your bro has challenged you again, this time promising he will NOT hold back. Requires you to beat Bro at least once, defeating him gives you an Undead Greatsword, dealing increased damage and regenerating when broken, even if its durability is still much higher than average.

Asylum Report: There have been incidents reported in the local mental health institution, yet it hasn't been abandoned or anything. If anything, it seems patient-friendly, so what's going on?

Would you kindly...?: Help deliver supplies to another town, with any vehicle you like.

THEY'RE NOT TACOS, YOU RACIST!: Something's attacking Mexico, and they're not fucking tacos. Get over there and help repel whatever it is.

HERE COMES A STEAMROLLER!: Crush any enemy from very, very high above with a car or any heavier vehicle. With very high above probably meaning, say, about four hundred meters into the air.

The red wunz go fasta: Take down an enormous camp of ogres. You can be granted a red "camouflage" that increases your agility by a whopping +5, but the ogres can easily spot you this way. You get whatever you can salvage from the camp.

Ascend: Reach the stratosphere, and possibly beyond! You can use any means necessary, but it's highly advised not to steal. Doing this doesn't really give you anything, but you'll be pretty admired and it opens up the way for lots of kinds of technologies. Just make sure you have the equipment to survive exit and reentry.

Sleuthly Diplomacy: Aliens have noticed you after you went ahead to "Ascend", and they want the planet for conflicting reasons. You must convince all of their ambassadors to leave the planet unharmed while catering to their individual interests. Rewards may vary.

Super Serum: Get or create a Super Serum: Originally called a Bloontonium Serum, other radioactive materials have surfaced of varying squality: Bloontonite has been reputed to produce the highest quality serums.

The Gift Of Fire: Find the Desert Temple, located SOMEWHERE in the Sahara Desert. Given how much the geography has upscaled, you'd be better off buying a plane ticket, unless you have a license and know the way OR got Super Monkey skills. Which are really, really hard to get, but SO worth it. Of course you're going to have to traverse the temple to reap its rewards.

Under The Sea: Find Atlantis, wherever the hell it is. You're going to need a submarine, or Super Monkey skills.

The Underground: There's an underground passage found in a magic-saturated area of the Amazon Rainforest. Check out what's in the passage.

Fury Of The Storm: A strange, otherworldly storm has appeared above the Chernobyl Disaster Area. Investigate it, using any means you can to get there alive.

Castle In The Sky: SOMEWHERE in some clouds... somewhere, is a floating city. Go find it I guess. Requires at least a 2/2 Ace, Helicopter or any level of Super Monkey skills.

Temple Of The Sun God: There have been reports of a new temple dedicated to a Sun God unrelated to the monkeys, and that it incinerates those it deems unworthy. Prove that you are in fact worthy.

Mystery Of The Moon: The Moon has been exhibiting unusual amounts of magic lately. You know what to do.

At The Mountains of Madness: Recent sightings of monstrous creatures in the Antarctic have necessitated investigations. Be very, VERY careful about how you go about this one. You will be heavily rewarded for any information you can scrounge up.

The Rainbow Out Of Space: Very rarely, you will chance upon a faceless, humanoid creature, glowing the colours of the rainbow in any temple. It's not known what his motives are, other than he won't bother you if you leave him alone.

The Prince In Black: Someone has arrived in this world. Whatever you do, if you see him, RUN.

The Vengeful Monkey: A mysterious temple has been spotted floating above Null Island, which isn't really an island or even land, but whatever it is, everyone's expecting the worst. You'd best investigate it.

{The Warrior of Steel}These are a different set of missions that put you on the path to becoming on par with a Super Monkey. Though you can do these in any order, please note that you only become a full fledged Super once these are all done, and that you need to know every tower's abilities for one of the missions. There's a heavy fee mentioned, but your Bro takes care of it.

The Strongest: Do 100 pushups, 100 situps, 100 squats and a 10 kilometer run in a day. If you can accomplish that, your Stamina and Strength shoot up 20 points, after a "cutscene" where you experience weird time shit and apparently did that for three years.

Lightning Fast Mage: Cast spells on the fly as you sprint along a small course, both in order to boost your speed and to avoid the thrown fruit from halting your progress. Once completed, you get a montage of you repeating harder and harder versions of the course, and your Agility and Magic shoots up 20 points.

The Smartest: This doesn't actually have anything to do with studying or actual methods on getting smarter, but you're downloading Kung Fu until suddenly MALWARE, which you have to fight off. Defeating them not only gives you Kung Fu (allegedly), but also boosts Intellectual by 20.

Are you a good person?: You're sent into a scenario where you're given the prospect of unlimited power and safety, at the cost of everyone's lives. All of them. Do you take it?

The Final Run: This is it. This obstacle course is your final entry exam into becoming a Super. You're going to need to utilize everything you've learned so far, which is actually everything you will ever learn from these monkeys. If you complete this, you get Super Monkey skills.

{"Civilian Quests"}These types of quests can be found if you just decide to explore and talk to people. Perhaps look for people to talk to?

{Players}